Uncertainty Kills Me

I can handle a lot of stress. Tons really. Bad things? No problem. Responsibility? Sure. I watched my mother and brother both die and was able to handle this. I’ve been in bad relationships and even worse break ups. Bad coworkers and irrational bosses. All these things I can deal with accordingly.

But what I can’t emotionally handle is UNCERTAINTY.

If I don’t know the details, I don’t know how to plan!!

This move in August is killing me. I don’t know what my salary will be or my start date. So I don’t know when to set my end date here. Or when to get an apartment there. Or to tell people they can move in to my place here (I’ll need someone to take over my lease).  I can’t reserve my moving cubes. Or make my plane tickets for my family reunion at the end of July.

I just want the pieces to fall in to place. I want to be able to plan for the future. I want to make moving budgets and start planning my “escape” out of here. Each day of not knowing just stresses me out so much….


8 Responses to Uncertainty Kills Me

  1. Okturn delMoniq says:

    Im sorry. =( Hopefully, you will hear back soon. I completely feel your pain.


  2. OK, just breathe.

    It’s hard when it feels like your life is on hold because you don’t know what the future will bring. However, this is kind of a delicious moment before you know everything and it gets boring again.

    Is there anything you can start doing now? Are you going to be moving yourself? Try packing up some boxes of items you rarely use. Any friends you want to say good-bye to? Go out for drinks now before your schedule goes crazy trying to find sublets and new apartments. Enjoy the calm before the storm!

  3. lifeasapurse says:

    I’m going through the same issue right now – I don’t know how much to save (I made up $4,000 as a reasonable-sounding number, but how do I know?) and the not-being-able-to-look-for-an-apartment is especially hard. I feel your pain, lady.

  4. eemusings says:

    Oh hun, I know – I am the same way. Agree with Paranoid – try to start packing, and get out there and do anything in your current city that you always wanted to but never got around to.

  5. I hope you hear soon!! In my case it took 2 months from interview to start date… and I was the only candidate!!!!

  6. Have you heard yet?
    I hope they don’t take too long. >_<

  7. Amen! You and me both.

    Sending good wishes your way that everything gets settled soon.

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